For all the talk of equal access, democratization, and transparency, we all know the Internet is really just a cesspool of urban legends, intellectual property theft, and sci fi supervillain scams. So join us in celebrating El Prof’s 27th as we strip to our birthday suits and dive headfirst into the digital sewer. Today we’re talking easy money, whether it’s eyeball stealing, meta messaging, or remixing a shitty mixtape into the stuff of legends. It’s your one-shop for ‘artistic’ ways of ripping random strangers off — and scroll to the end free n00dz worth 0.05eth we’ll airdrop to you if you help us do the same. Here’s everything important on the Internet.
Chad & El Prof
Wu-Tang is for the suckers.
The one-of-a-kind Wu-Tang album has now passed from the hands of a ruthless capitalist to a hapless government to a collective of crypto degens. Is it the Hope Diamond of the Internet Age? A Thomas Crown Affair worthy scam? Or the Tarantino movie we don’t want but deserve? We’ve tracked the less-than-storied history of this living MacGuffin, what it means for the future of the culture, and why PleasrDAO (owners of a doge meme they’ve compared to the Mona Lisa) is its ideal home.
Amateur remixes worth $4k a pop.
If selling a mixtape of misbegotten b-sides as fine art doesn’t scream ‘looming death of the culture’ then this will. CryptoPunk’s multimillion dollar 8-bit avatars and Damien Hirst’s series of kindergarten quality dot paintings both illuminate a unique critique and dimension of the modern art market. What is money? What is art? And what is more 2021 than an unaffiliated mashup of those two projects selling for 1eth a pop? El Prof answers these freshman stoner questions because we’re sick of being asked.
Eye am watching you.
Because reality wasn’t Black Mirror enough, these guys are getting paid $1b to take pictures of your eyeballs. Yes. Really. Silicon Valley is betting big on you giving away the window to your soul to these guys. No. Your eyes are not deceiving you. Not yet at least. In our raise of the week, we follow Snowden’s lead, peer into Worldcoin’s totally-not-suss-at-all business strategy, and hypothesize on what exactly these smarmy white dudes want with our fucking irises.
Trusting 3rd Parties for Dummies.
El Prof ends on a heady note, discussing the perils of DAOs, hippie communes, and power vacuums. The arguments against centralization are many, so bear with us while we tried to justify defending it anyway, having just shat all over the Succession extras at Worldcoin for doing the same.